My Bad! – A Girl’s Story of a Disaster Date

“Music saves the soul.” Play softly while you read.

Lesson learned, never drink too much bring a date in a music beach fest. Haha. . but i admit i’ve been stupid that night.

I’m sorry that i introduced you as my cousin to my friends when you obviously expressed your disapproval on the idea of it. I hated it too but I thought you wanted to be romantically introduced to my friend so the point of you being related to me came up. We were laughing at my mischief at first but you kept quiet afterwards. My bad.

I’m not sorry that i drank too much, much more than you did, i think. I can’t swear not to over-drink again as it is, to me, similar to saying i’ll stop holding on to the goodness of this really fucked up world. However, i swear not to get tired admiring the sincerity in your smile, your bubbly, loving and calm soul who, i’d like to believe, would grin after comprehending humble and apologetic words from a woman who’s been outrageously wrong. But then again, i know, my bad.

I’m sorry that i was dying to kiss you but didn’t have the courage to pursue. I stared at your half sleepy eyes, but you were cold looking far, seemed annoyed. You’ve seen everything except my attention-seeking eyes. I still wanted my lips to touch yours and be lost in the moment, but, i dared not. My bad.

I’m sorry that i left you in the middle of the night, alone, while i continue the intake of the evil alcohol. I was a fool extremely boozed, not realizing the uncontrollably infuriating monster in me slowly introduced herself to you. My bad.

I’ve forgotten many things the following sunrise and cursed the terrible headache, but the thought of you showing up last night, looking and smelling good lingered in my mind. I didn’t tell you, i didn’t know how, my bad.

And oh, i’m sorry i drunk texted you. Some were meaningful, but mostly were weird, I had no fuckin’ idea what exactly was on my mind that very minute. I knocked my head against the wall the moment i read my own shenanigans and told myself, “shit, my bad.”

I know I am not at all the feminine creature you crave for. I think I can never be considered as a soft spoken, delicate lady most men dream of. Worse, I can be at times a real dick, but with strong support to feminist priorities. I cannot change who i am overnight and get my shit together just because I liked your cute dimple on your cheek. I can try but I’m sorry, my bad.

-denice the menace



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